The Sun is Shining.. :)

I feel that I have accomplished so much in so little time! :)

I have FINALLY figured out how I'm gonna do my Pharm Ana 2 portfolio.Yay!!! I feel so intelligent now that I have figured it out. I have also completed part 1 of my Med.Chem portfolio, but I think I'll have to re-do it, but I'll just submit the one which I painstakingly did. And I have to clarify some issues on part 2 of med.chem. but the rest are all settled..this time tomorrow, I'll finally be able to start going through my notes which currently have a layer of dust over them. I also figured out how to de-stress, eat loads of chocolates! Whenever I start hyperventilating, I just stuff one in my mouth and all the worries fade away. you should seriously try it. It WORKS.

I was going about the whole of today thinking it was Wednesday. Only like 5 minutes ago I realised today was Thursday. Gosh, why does time have to fly so fast? Before you know it I'll be having panic attacks before the EOS!

I have also decided to take my time in doing med chem and pharm ana portfolio because it carries 20% and I don't want to rush on it cause then I might lose my 20%. Some people may not realise, but that 20% can decide whether or not you are going to get your A for the finals.If it was 5% I would seriously close one eye and do it..but since its 20%, I just can't do it.

I'm also very happy because I just finished a bitch session with my old school friends.I think that every now and then we are allowed to be bitchy and laugh at the people who are weaker than us. Its really fun if you gave it a try. We were making fun at all the people we used to bully in school. It was fun back then doing it and now its fun to talk about. :)

I just can't figure out why I'm so happy now.. I mean, 2 days of anger has apparently boiled down and I feel so... serene... and calm...and hungry..

I think I'm going to find something to eat.

Cheers! :)

Love,

Lady Sha Sha

Another torturous day.. :(

Another day spent locking myself in my room, completing my damn portfolios. I think the reason behind why I'm killing my self doing it is because:

(a)I did not start on it earlier

(b)I'm planning on completing all 5 before the 1st review

And it is these 2 reasons which are draining all my energy away. Because of the portfolios I missed a trip back to Ipoh to see my grandma. If she dies, and I don't get to see her, it is because of my portfolios!(I hope she comes and haunts all the lecturers responsible) 3 down, 2 to go... I'm planning on completing both by tomorrow, God knows if I will be able to, maybe I should just not sleep and kill my self doing it.. i dunno..*sighs*

The fact that I have to finish it all by tomorrow and start reading my exceptionally high stack of lecture notes just adds more stress to an already stressed person!

IMU should pay for our holidays, seeing that they enjoy torturing us with the workload,a well deserved holiday as a "thank-you-for-killing-your-self-in-the-process-of-completing-the-work-we-gave-you" gift would be nice.

This is only week FOUR and I'm stressing..imagine the study break later?? Last sem wasn't THAT stressful but I still ended having panic attacks and burst in tears the night before the exams,and in between that, re-read my notes..I think I deserve a NOBEL prize for handling stress.

I also think that I should slap my self on face and get back to writing nonsense about some metals and stuff.. *sniff-sniff*

Love,

Lady Sha Sha

Why the bloody hell do we need to do 5 f*cking portfolios!

Why, oh WHY in heavens good graces do I need to do 5 stupid portfolios?!!!!!!! I understand that portfolios were intended on helping us improve our writing skills for something in sem 7, but why FIVE?!!!! I mean, 2,3 i can handle..but FIVE?!!! and the most stupid part of it all is that they expect you to give like a million references for one bloody portfolio! I mean, they all say the same thing, so why the hell must I go and list down 10 stupid references when I can get all the info I want in 2 or 3 references?!!! Last sem I listed 5 references and the person who marked my portfolio told me that it was TOO little. but I had all the info, so why again do I need that many references? WHY SHOULD I READ THE SAME THING 10 TIMES AND LIST IT DOWN?!!!! WHY????????????????????????????????

I honestly don't see the point in making us list a million references, you want us to do our homework, we do it, but WHY must it be soooooooooo much?!!! isn't it possible to gather all the info u need in just a couple of books? I sooooooo don't get why i need to list down a bunch of references which i didn't even read but included anyway so that there will not be a comment that my reference is too little!

I am sitting here, reading materials from 4 different books which pretty much say the same damn thing. and trust me, 4 references is NEVER enough for them! just take 10 fat books and slap me with it NOW! PLEASE!

GOD! after my exams I am sooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo gonna burn my portfolios! I think I can make a little campfire out of them.. maybe i'll include my notes as well in case I decide to roast marshmallows on the fire...:)

Till my next mood swing,

Love

Lady Sha Sha

Pre-CNY hols Sasau-ness

Last Friday was the day before we all left for our CNY hols. Even the non-Chinese were all excited for the hols because we too celebrate it. That day we had Pharmaceutics Practical from 9-12, and us being us, we were already in the holiday mood. So while the lecturer wasn't around, we had a fun time posing in the most ridiculous poses and take a few snap shots. The first one includes me trying to strangle one of my fellow classmates..:)

Then there was the "gun-shot" pic..

Followed by the "slap" shots...

And after all of that, we had to clean up.... :(

And after cleaning up, we stopped fighting.. :)..and me and stacie were clearly not paying any attention to the photographer...hehe

Anyway,  we had a lot of fun during the practical session and we hope to have more fun in the coming sessions! Enjoy the Hols!

P/S: No one was hurt in the shooting of these photographs..we voluntarily posed for the pics.. :)

Love,

Lady Sha Sha

Kiasu-ness at its best

As a Malaysian, no matter what race you are, as you mix and grow up, you tend to pick up some words from another language from another race. It is inevitable unless you are cut off from society or, you just don't mix with other races. As a Non-Chinese, my Chinese friends introduced me to the term "kiasu" which in my understanding, refers to the people who are selfish, refuse to share what they have with others, and most importantly, afraid to lose.

I am gonna just ask, what is the harm of sharing with others? I mean, if you yourself are more then eager to suck off anything you can get from the other person, why can't you share what you have? I honestly don't get the whole point of being "kiasu". More over, when it comes to the time to exhibit the knowledge you have( class tests, bla,bla,bla), the very same people who were afraid to share a TEENY, WEENY bit of knowledge they have, ends up doing worse than you. Which goes to show that God is FAIR! Why do people fail to see that I don't know. But I am happy to be able to realise the faults in kiasu-ness and denounce it. So what about you?

Love,

Lady Sha Sha

Expectations

Expectations, what are they? I think they are what people hope or expect us to do. And F.Y.I, I hate it! Especially when someone lets you know that they are expecting some things from you. It only ends up mounting unnecessary pressure on the individual. And if you don't meet that expectation, you'll only end up being disappointed with your self and you'll even go on feeling horrible that you have let someone down. I mean, right now everyone is complaining about how the current semester is like a fucking killer semester. I don't need to be reminded of it thank you very much. However, the lecturers of IMU feel that it is a MUST to remind us about it. I mean, you tell me that in the early of the semester, fine. But please stop repeating it! Plus, there are some lecturers whose names I refuse to mention due to respect, have the tendency to discourage the students from achieving the very best. I mean, they are suppose to be older than us so wouldn't that make them wiser?? Shouldn't they know that MOST students have a tendency to make their minds up about something and stick to it? I mean, they walk in and say, "This module is very tough" or something along the line which tells the students that it is impossible to get an A for that particular paper. Knowing the students they will start to make excuses when they fail to understand something from that particular subject.

I mean, if you want us to do well, shouldn't you encourage us?? I have a feeling that the lecturers don't really want us to step up and bring it to the table. Or maybe they want to see who doesn't get influenced by what they say. I dunno, but one thing I'm very sure off is that the only lecturer in IMU which I can say gives motivation to us is none other then our dearly beloved Prof. Peter. I mean, maybe he's the only one who realises that we constantly need to be motivated. We are students, every now and then we need a little nudge to push us. I know we are suppose to be responsible for our own learning and all but we are MALAYSIAN students, and we were spoon fed all the way. This is when we are informed that learning is our responsibility. And throwing us straight into the fire isn't the wisest idea. I honestly don't understand why some lecturers have like heaps of hope on us and tell us straight to our faces that we disappoint them. Here is a word of advice, expect nothing and be surprised!

Love always,

Lady Sha Sha

Lessons that are meant to be learnt

Every person has problems. Every problem has a solution. For every problem there is a lesson to be learnt and taught. The most important part of the problem is whether or not the lesson was learnt.

To be able to learn from problems is to be able to analyse it when it shows it self to you rather than just focusing on solving it.I'm not saying don't solve your problems, I'm saying that in every action that taken, there are certain things that need to be understood and learnt. If you want to see the bigger picture, just look back 5 years ago, see where you were and see where you are now.Analyse how much of your character that has changed. Judge for yourself whether the change was for the better or for the worse.

I look back 5 years ago, at the beginning of 2004, and I feel a sudden pang of nostalgia.For some people it was a horrendous period in their lives and they are glad that it is long gone and forgotten behind them. For me, I use it as a tool to see how much of me has changed ( Plus, I see it as one of the best times of my life! :) ). Back then I was arrogant, kinda of a bully ( which I regret,and am truly,deeply sorry for being one), and the world was at my feet.

Now, I don't think I am as arrogant as I was before, I don't bully people any more, and I don't think that 100% of my world is at my feet. But I think, I am who I am today because of the everyday lessons learnt that changed who I am now. I think now I realise that arrogance brings you no power ( although it did work back when I was in school), I realise that making people's life miserable so that we could laugh was a horrible thing to do(And yes, slap me in the face for the things that I have done), and most importantly, not everyone sees you as a priority ( which is why the world is not at my feet)

If there was one thing that I have retained from 5 years ago, which I am still proud of is my confidence and determination to do whatever I have set my eyes on. Tell me otherwise and I still will not believe you until I have gone through it and learnt my lesson. I admire myself for actually being able to still have that "fire" in me for after so long. Even when I'm not as popular now as I was 5 years back, I think I managed to preserve values and habits which benefit me dearly. And I am proud of being able to do so. Confidence and determination are easily shaken if a person does not believe in themselves and if they are filled with self doubt.

With growing, we learn, with those lessons learnt, we become wiser. Am I wise? NO. Am I wiser than 5 years ago? YES.

Love,

Lady Sha Sha