Oh, hello sem 7, didn’t realise that you’re here already.

Anybody took a look at the time table yet?

And to those who did take a look, do you feel the stress?

I mean, I peaked at the workload sheet and realised that we are prolly gonna start sem 8 really soon after sem 7 and that means the final, yes, final semester before we graduate and move out into the harsh reality.

Gosh, how time flies.

I feel like it was only yesterday when I was done with sem 4 and I was thinking that I’m half way there. And here I am, shocked at how fast it all moved.

Half of me wants to run backwards, the other half is excited for what is to come. I think the reason why I want to run backwards is because I’m afraid of what lies ahead, but then again, since I’m aware of my “fear”, I can deal with it. I have another year left to deal with it and mentally prepare my self for the future.

And I’m also excited for the future because I think it is going to be challenging and I think it will be fun to see how I make it out there. But let’s not get ahead of ourselves now shall we?

I’m currently excited for sem 7 because this time around it is not the same as the old semesters where there’ll be just lectures/workshops/PSDs/ practicals/ etc. This semester is something new, and I’m excited! :)

And to those haven’t heard it yet, Dr.Madhu has left IMU =(. I bumped into her yesterday. But Dr.Arjun is still around. =)

That nagging feeling……

I woke up today from a very weird dream. A dream that in a way I wished was reality and that I never woke up from.

I dreamt of my grandma. She was in a wheelchair and she was talking to me, and we were chatting. And when I woke up, I realised that I missed her.

Most of you wouldn’t really know my grandma’s story. Well if you put together the time she’s spent living with my family, it would be around 18 years or so, on and off. So yea, it can be said that I was close to her. In 2006, she had a fall, fractured her leg, and became bed-ridden.Then a year later, in August 2007, just about a month after I entered IMU, she had a stroke. She then became what we call a ‘vegetable’. She can’t talk, can’t open her eyes, can’t eat, can’t move. Basically, it is like she’s having a very long nap.And she gets fed through a tube.

A week before her stroke, I visited her and spent like 3 hours, just talking to her.I talk nonsense to my grandma and she still listens to me as if I’m sane. To date, she is the ONLY person who understands me when I speak Tamil. (Yes, I do speak Tamil, but I only do it to save my life because I suck at it,and if i do have to speak, i struggle,a LOT).

So when I woke up from this dream, I wished that she was still able to talk to me, that she was around for me to practice my crappy Tamil on. I woke up today to realise that I miss my grandma. And I do have regrets. Remember when I said that she lived with my family and I most of her time? She did. And when I was a teen, I was a pain the ass. I was selfish. It wasn’t until she had a stroke when I realised I won’t be able to talk to her anymore. I sometimes think back at the times when I was younger, and she would wanna talk to me, and I would just tell her that I’m busy or something, just so that I can do my own thing, and I don’t have to talk to her,or the time when it was just me and her at home and I would lock my self in the room and leave the TV on downstairs so that I don’t have to entertain her and I regret being that way to her. I guess I learnt my lesson the hard way. And yes, I already told you, I was a horrible person when I was a teen, a person I’m kind of ashamed of. But thank God I’ve changed.

And I missed the fun times I shared with her. The times when me and my bro will tell her absolutely ridiculous stories, and she would believe it, or we thought she did. She knew we were talking nonsense and she played along to entertain us. I miss the times she would argue with my parents not to punish me when I did something naughty when I was a kid. She was always on my side.

I woke up today in tears, because I realised how I wasn’t grateful for the people and the things I had in my life when I did have them, and now, no matter what I do, there are something's which I can’t get back.

But I am grateful for the 3 hours I spent talking to her the week before she had a stroke. I can still talk to her, but the it is just that she can’t talk back. I still sit by her bed and update her every time I visit her  because I don’t know if she can hear me or not, but if she can, I’m sure she’ll want to know what's going on.

I just really miss talking to her. It is not the same when the person you are talking to doesn’t answer back.

And the whole day, I just had that feeling in me. I really don’t know how to explain it, it is like a tooth ache, always there, not too painful to immobilise you, but it hurts and you want it to stop.

And as I said, I learnt my lesson the hard way. Ever since that day, I always spend more time with my parents,got rid of the attitude problem, and I hope to be a better person than who I was before. I’m now more grateful for the things I have.

I don’t wanna  live in regret.

The moral of the story: Anyone out there who still doesn’t know how to appreciate what you have, LISTEN to me, and start cherishing them. Why? Because I said so and I’m always right!

:p

My Mitch Albom Infatuation

How many of you guys out there have read any book by Mitch Albom?

I’m a fan, a HUGE fan of his.

Have you read his books? They are mind blowing. Literally. After reading his books, I’ll need time to breathe and digest whatever I’ve read because they are that powerful. His books are life changing.

I’ve read all of his books; Tuesdays with Morrie, The Five People You Meet in Heaven, For One More Day, and Have a Little Faith.

His books will make you think in a way you may not have thought before. It sheds light on things which you might have wondered about, but never really figured out. It might even change your life.

After reading The Five People You Meet in Heaven, I wasn’t afraid of death anymore. Have a little Faith opened my eyes to things around me which I have questioned before.

All his books changed me for the better. They make me happy and they teach me how to be a better person. His books also taught me what’s important in life, what needs to be prioritised, and it made me scrutinise my own life-style and the way I think.

I can relate to his books, in more than one way. And I always re-read them because they bring me peace. In times when I’m super pissed, or when I’m depressed and am confused, I read his books.

I have my own demons to face everyday,and his books help me deal with them.

Thank God for Mitch Albom.

My Retail Therapy Session

Anitha, Radhika and I went shopping today! :)

Joanne was suppose to come but she was sick. :( Hope she gets well soon.

I bought a top, a pair of flats, a pair of heels and some earrings.

I still don feel satisfied.

I need to shop again.

This time, I’ll focus more on clothes, since I already have my shoes :)

Shopping is so therapeutic! It removes all negativity from my soul. It makes me feel happy. Happy is good. :)

My Rollercoaster Emotions.

Since the exams have ended and I’ve collected my results, till now, the best word to describe my emotions is: volatile.

One minute I’m good, the next I’m not!

I’ve had my share of highs and lows, the joy and the frustration.

The frustration.

I’ve been taking care of Pumpkin for 4 weeks now. She’s been sick. In the past 4 weeks it has been crazy. Some days her condition will improve, and some days it worsens. Today it worsened. She’s been limping around since morning and in order to minimise her movement, she decided to just sleep 24/7. She doesn’t want to eat or drink. Meaning I have to force food and water down her.

If you are wondering what’s wrong with her, she’s having something the vet calls “tick fever”. And the irony of the WHOLE situation is that she has NO ticks, and there are no other dogs living in house which can infect her, meaning she must have contracted it from the Groomers. And usually, the chances of that happening is low, but it happened. *sigh*

The Annoyance.

Ok, I think everyone knows I dislike liars, I mean, who likes them? And one thing I don’t get is why people lie? And the best part of it all is that they continue lying TO YOUR FACE without realising that you know they are lying. SERIOUSLY, telling someone the truth is A MILLION times better than lying to their face. No matter how bad you THINK they are gonna react, it is still better than lying to them. Liars are so annoying!

The other thing which is annoying is promising someone something and cancelling it the very second before. Gosh! I feel like slapping these people!

The Joy.

I’ve been visiting a lot of people this holidays and they include friends, uncles, aunties,nieces, nephews… and the list goes on.

And I’ve been shopping! :D